So I'm back to roleplaying in the Harry Potter world. And this is my character, Tessa White.

Tessa White l Sixth Year l Gryffindor l FC: Victoria Justice l TAKEN
Tessa is different from everyone else, she see’s things differently and she thinks about things differently. Most people would describe her as psycho or crazy since she spends time muttering to herself. She can be quite the trouble maker, generally going around the castle causing mischief. She has rather abnormal social behavior and she doesn’t know how to filter what she’s saying.  

That's her character description thing in the RP blog. And I must say, I sort of like playing her. She comes from a dark place in my heart. She's quite different from the usual ones I play. I usually play a Victoria Justice FC, of course, but she's always happy and nice. It's different. She feels alone and so unloved, but she can be friendly and nice too. The other characters just don't know what to expect from her, and I love it.


But I'm probably just going to drop-out of this RP because I don't even think the players are pure Potterheads.

Other news: I HAVE MY OWN RP.

Well, I co-own it but I'm usually the one who manages it because I have nothing to do.

My character, Melanie, is a depressed schizo and she has 2 siblings. The older sibling, Meldrick (Darren Criss FC), is, like, the perfect student. And her sister, Melody, is the HBIC. 

But she's secretly in love with her best friend (Logan Lerman) and has a tiny attraction to the bad boy (Alex Pettyfer).

Things are sort of going well, but I do terribly wish that the players were on more.

kendra the spoiled bitch. she’s actually really nice but she just loves spending. 24

drew walks away all the time but walks in when everyone walks out on you. he looks like bieber lol but he’s more handsome. bad/mysterious guy at the age of 16 and he likes to smoke. he looks sort of hipster. just sort of, he hates it when i say he does.

ebenezer is meanest person you will ever meet, british. and he’s the richest man i know. for some reason, no one knows how old he really is.

bella is the playful rehead. she’s 12 and she really loves to play and wow.

sonia takes care of me. she’s mexican and she lost her daughter to a fire. i’m guessing she’s 40.

nick is a very talkative and opinionated person. i think he’s bi. 17. i like to cuddle with him. hippies united

brett is 19 and he’s very responsible and mature. he’s the one who always bails anyone out of jail. hippies united

luce likes to throw things at people. and she’s quite judgmental. uhm she’s 17 and a half. hippies united

grey is really full of surprises. he never really listens idk he reminds me of a chipmunk when he moves. 16. hippies united

fabulous ryan the daredevil! this guy will literally do any dare. srsly. 18. hippies united.

i salute carlos santiago! he’s a dictator of this unknown country in south america. he’s quite short-tempered but we’re cool. i’m guessing he’s 50+ idk

uriel the angel… from hell.

i also have visits from lucky the demon.

I feel Russian.






I am Russian.

I just copied and pasted this from my tumblr.

Based from how I act with people, I’m probably the last person they would think to have a deep fascination with history.

I mean, I just fucking love it so much. I actually don’t care if I fail my other subjects as long as I get to read about dead things and old people everyday.

No one really asked me why I love it, or how my fascination started. No one knew, no one cared.

Well, I probably took after my dad. We both love war and shooting and guns. So I’d watch those war films with him. And I guess it just started from that. But before I got into history, I loved astrology. All those planets and stars up there sort of make you feel small and like your problems are so small, they aren’t even there. And with the question of the unknown. Anything is possible. We’re simply small humans; we know nothing. We are merely a speck in this huge mystery filled with heavenly bodes, and possibly more life forms.

But anyway, where was I again?

Oh yeah. Why do I love history?

When Drew asks me that question, I sort of scratch my head and mumble incoherently. 

Drew intimidates me.

But actually, Nick got to ask me that question once and I answered something like, “What’s not to love about it? God. Just looking and reading about these people gives you a glimpse back to the past. The better past. It’s like being in a new place and time. Like when you read books, Nick. Do you even read books, loser?”

I guess that’s it.

Oh, and I love reading how messed up people back then were. Actually, the times have changed but the people’s minds haven’t.

There’s still cannibalism, and discrimination.

This blog discourages the latter, but promotes cannibalism .39%.

I just have a feeling if they meet and if given the right amount of time, they'd click. They look cute together and I just love to see manips of them. 

He'd be really protective of her, I know that. And even though, he's the one who usually jokes around, she'd joke around too. And he'd feel this urge to protect. 

Sweet lawd. Crying over a couple that might never exist. Welcome to my Friday night.

I don't know, but I got a little attracted to him when I saw this.

Alex's band. 

               

                 This day started at night. Well, actually at 5 in the afternoon. Alex's band, Jungle Gym, played at a park, and there was supposed to be this party. I didn't want to go, but Nick dragged me! Really! He did! So yeah, here are some people I don't even know. Nick and I fell asleep there, and then we went with Alex's band to the forest and this is a picture of us approaching the woods.

 

Nick and I went for a walk, but look at this pretty picture I took of our campsite.

This blog is basically proof that my life is sad.

~went through some of the pictures I saved and hoped I could tell you all some story~

Eyes.

Finally got to see my baby after a week. I arrived at 2:00 PM and took a picture of him from afar. He looks sad. Yeah, he's just lost in thought. He didn't even realize I was sitting beside him until I gave him a peck on the cheek. And we hugged, and kissed. And talked. It was wonderful.

I got to take a picture of "emo Pat" as I call it.

They actually played a show and I took this with my phone. The band was brilliant. As always.

After their show, we had a barbecue.

Next morning, I went to the grocery with Pat. Ha-ha! I love you, darling!

Went back to the hotel and sneaked a picture. It was nice to see him laugh. Gosh.

We all went hiking for a little on the last day. Just had fun with the guys, and we played hide-and-seek. 

Dinner before I went. 

I almost cried when I got in the car that was taking me to the airport. John gave me one last kiss, and we said good-bye. 

It was a wonderful 2-day-vacay. 

Can't wait to see them, and him.

different timezone, no inspiration?

I've been having a great dilemma lately.
I've lost all sense of creativity and imagination. I feel bland, dry, dull.

It's horrible.

I just want to write and write and write since I have all this free-time, but nothing is coming out. Only sad thoughts and suicide and death and the dark.

4/20 so fuck it!

Gare bear is a cutie pat00tie.

2 things I love: the team and... a Sharpie pen. What? You thought it was going to be that weirdo? Me?  Psh.

Ratboy. What a brat.

              

                                                      

  

This. This brought tears to my eyes. 

Because I've felt this way.

Every single day.

I don't get it. Is this """photography"""? There's a mirror with lights by a door. That's it?

Now this is photography.

But then again who am I to say what is?

(I just don't get the first picture. That's all.)